Friday, March 24, 2006

Bathtime News

Apparently, some guy in Afghanistan is on trial for converting from Islam to Christianity. This now adds "religious freedom" to the list of things that are illegal in Afghanistan. Other activities which have been made illegal in Afghanistan include "poking Muslim clerics with sticks", "free thought" and "farting on elevators".

Evidently, a critical bug has been found in Internent Explorer, an Internet browswer which, up until now, has been very stable, offered much in the way of power and features, and has seen few problems. Oh, sorry, did I say "Internet Explorer"? I thought they were talking about Firefox.

Pope Benedict XVI created 15 new cardinals, praying that the red garments they now wear would inspire them to an even more "passionate love for Christ, for his church and for all humanity." Each robe costs approximately $2,300.00, and the hats run about $900.00 apiece. The pope made his announcement about "love for all humanity" from within his multi-billion dollar palatial home. The poor and hungry were not available for comment, as they were busy searching for food scraps in Vatican dumpsters.

The creators of South Park have killed off Chef, over problems which arose after Isaac Hayes (the voice of Chef) quit the show. He did so as a result of recent 'intolerance and bigotry towards religious beliefs' expressed by the show. Those religious beliefs being his own. Apparently, Hayes was not bothered by episodes that lampooned Christianity, Islam and Judaism. Fuck you, Isaac Hayes. Fuck you in your intolerant, brain-washed ass with a rolled-up copy of Dianetics.

2 comments:

Kim Ayres said...

Still trying to work out the Internet explorer connection in your rants. The other three are all to do with religion. Mind you, if you do want a connection then you could follow this link:

http://jokemail.blogspot.com/2006/03/bill-gates-choice.html

Jim Donahue said...

To be fair, there are reports that Hayes has been seriously ill since January, and that the statement wasn't really issued by him. There are numerous interviews around, from after the Scientology ep aired, in which he proclaimed his loyalty to the show and said the jibes didn't bother him.